Sometimes, I feel lost, as if I'm floating down a river with no control whatsoever of speed, direction or time.It is frustrating to say the least.And there is also the situation I have of not being able to get her out of my mind, which is sad, because she doesn't even know about it, and most likely, she doesn't care. Even if she does care, it is highly unlikely she'd feel the same way. Time, distance and more makes it too complicated to be able to start something with her, despite how much I'd like to give it a try.Am I over-thinking this? Perhaps.This crude media just can't truly encapsulate the emotions that run through me and the wishes I have.I need to shut my brain and my mouth and strike all the demons that attempt to break out. Curse my brain and my reasons, which are both out of hand and out season, without love and without feeling so bad.My words defy my plans, my life and betray my thoughts. I hope this feelings will pass sooner rather than later. Need to push onwards

Almost done with my social service. I feel honored with the communities for wanting and asking me to stay.