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We find some stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herders inside the wrestling ring.

By now if you’re reading this, chances are that you’ve seen the latest chapter in the Star Wars Universe, Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. If you haven’t, you’re not a Star Wars fan and are probably here because you heart me. Since it’s making a killing at the box-office (Duh!) and many fans unwrapped Star Wars action figures, vehicles and playsets on Christmas morning, we figured why not merge this cool franchise with another love of ours: pro wrestling!

Just like Star Wars, the WWE Universe has its share of heroes, villains, scoundrels and some weird looking people that could pass for aliens. Considering The Rock is in 75% of Hollywood movies, and John Cena is transitioning more into films and TV, there’s a good chance a WWE Superstar might end up in a Star Wars project in the near future. To speed things up — or go into hyperdrive, if you will — we look at the current roster and spotlight talent that could be characters in a Star Wars movie. So before we head into 2017, let’s go to a wrasslin’ galaxy far, far away!

Before we begin, we say goodbye to the beautiful and strong, Carrie Fisher (1956-2016). Forever our Princess, may you rest in peace.  

 

Droids: The New Day

Lucasfilm_Droids_WWE

Droids in the Star Wars Universe come in various shapes and sizes, each with their own unique and entertaining personality. While the trio of Xavier Woods, Big E and Kofi Kingston don’t act robotic or lack emotion, their personalities would make for hilarious droids. We’re talking good droids here, not the kind that are bounty hunters or work for the Galactic Empire. New Day, the resident gamers and fanboys of WWE, would embrace their roles as comic relief similar to classic robots like R2-D2, C-3PO and BB-8.

But what kind of droids would this charismatic trio be? With his loud and brash personality, Woods would make a great astromech droid. The large and in charge Big E would be a droid that only replies with “who?”, serving as a bigger than usual protocol droid. He’ll do for droids what Groot did for trees.

As for Kofi with his highflying ways, he’s a probe droid (the other kind) always in the air, snooping around for trouble to get into.

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