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NADA MUCHO says:"I had no idea how to start this review. I considered an analogy to being “on the last belt hole” after eating too much turkey or mentioning that the album has a sample of “Stayin’ Alive,” mentions Eddie and the Cruisers and ends with the word “cocaine” and a cat’s meow. None of these sounded opener-worthy.
Thankfully, when the band took the stage during a recent Tractor Tavern appearance, guitarist Kurt Bloch summed it up nicely: “If the last song wasn’t your thing, then your song is coming up next.”
This rings true on For Whom the Beltholes, a music channel-surfing ode to everything good that pop music has offered from 1961 to present.
Sure you can make comparisons to about twenty or thirty artists that they have borrowed from, but they owe as much to them as a chameleon does to its surroundings. The ‘Holes tackle each genre with delicious precision and endless sarcastic humor.
For Whom the Beltholes! is a sonically complex album where tracks blend into one another with sequencing reminiscent of Pink Floyd’s The Wall. Many bands have attempted such cohesion, but take a listen to effects-laden 60’s sounding gems “Once in Awhile” and “The Opening Band” and take note on how it’s done correctly.
Pulling off an album with tracks as varied as the countrified “Lady in the Box,” with its clever, self deprecating lyrics (“I had 27 dollars and I put it in your hand/Then I said something stupid and you didn’t give a shit"); and the punch-a-hole-in-the-wall rocker “Minus On The Wedding” with likewise irresistible, hooky lyrics; and “Evil Baby,” which could easily stunt double for any track on GnR’s Appetite for Destruction, is no small feat.
Such carefully planned story-telling is like dismantling a bomb with five different defusing wires. Choose poorly and the entire city block is destroyed. Luckily for the ‘Holes, they pull a MacGyver and correctly cut the green wire. To put it simply, there isn’t a bad track on the album. For Whom… is filled to the brim with rocking piano, eyebrow searing guitar solos, foot pounding rhythms and songs that stick instantly.
Take anxious pop rocker “Rockin' Retro Losers,” (with which I sonically pulverized my co-workers with for two weeks straight) or the honky-tonkin’, beer-soaked “Bored With The Lord.”
Sharing lead vocal duties, Kwab Copeland and Fred Speakman create an album full of well-crafted harmonies. When Anthony Clementi fills in the low end with his superb bass style, something magical is created.
Their sound rocks. Their music rules. They have probably stuck gum under your desk and made obscene phone calls from your Mom’s house. They probably worship the devil. They probably own a PeeChee with Van Halen written on it.
And they’ve released a “must-listen” debut album. - (9/10)"
Deaf Sparrow says:
“I dig all of the songs contained in this record. And I also dig all of the songs that inspired them. That sorta makes me feel like a man full of doubts that can’t distinguish between the real thing and a band of pranksters who can really play and pull off different styles. I knew this was supposed to be fun (the fine liner notes are quite clear of The Beltholes’ intent) Truth of the matter is, I need bands like these; those with an identity unknown, whose mere existence is the spontaneous idea of a past listening experience. It makes me feel like I am listening to the real thing, but guess what, I am not. Best of all, I am not making any rich people richer. This wouldn’t be it, if there wasn’t any talent and of that The Beltholes has enough to piss off a few famous people. No one shall come to For Whom The Beltholes expecting pure rock, or pure boogie, or pure punk, or pure garage. If in the need for all of the above, then this is it.”
West Coast Performer says:
“Seattle’s The Beltholes carry on the proud tradition of artists who have used the iconic Meet The Beatles record as the basis for an album cover and some folks will probably check it out on that merit alone. The music inside For Whom the Beltholes, however, only occasionally recalls The Beatles. The Beltholes’ musical tastes are so varied that a single sound can’t be pegged on these guys. Producer Kurt Bloch manages to wring a thoroughly satisfying, big-time sound out of the band, with occasional segues to keep the music from encountering too much dead space..
Any faults are redeemed on the album’s single funniest song, “Rockin’ Retro Losers,” in which the band assumes the point of view of a misguided critic and takes shots at bands who rip off the old masters — bands like The Beltholes, for instance. They can and do laugh at themselves, and it makes all the difference.”
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